The creative side of me!

Lost in Dark Tunnel

Yes I knew it was tough
But I desired to contend
to make it through to the end

It was all dark
I saw nothing, I saw nobody
A dark endless tunnel
my sides were invisible
was I becoming blind?
Yet I marched ahead
It shaped into a black cloud,
slowly encircling me
I wondered what to do
Panic surged through my veins
I was loosing faith
I wanted to run away
And I turned back,
To find where I forked in from

But, suddenly I saw a faint beam
it was a ray of light
for me, it was a ray of hope
Hope to get through the darkness!
I accelerated towards the light,
Regaining confidence at each step

And then I saw him,
smiling, welcoming with open arms,
As if he knew I would come through!

Soon I was in his embrace
Feeling his warmth
it was a rejoicing victory!

Now,I’ll never run away
Coz I know, if I am lost
He will be there to illuminate my path,
showing me the way out of the tunnel!

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Mirage

I felt thirsty, wanted water
And there, I saw it…
I ran to grab it,
But, it seemed to go away
away from my existence!

Where am I?
Do I know this place?
It was all the same yesterday
But it sounds unfamiliar today…

Is that really water I am running after?
Mirage – Is that the reality of my life?

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I wanna spend a day without ‘Me’ !

A Tiny tribute to the unique personality, who has now become an irreplaceable part of my life.

I wanna spend a day without ‘Me’
‘Me’ – my righteous self
Who takes thorny tracks
Careless of all the desires
Of this impeccant heart!

I wanna spend a day without ‘Me’
This ‘Me’ again springs thinking aloud
Interrogating the morality
Of this uncanny desire!

Helpless I feel envisioning
How incomplete I’m, without this ‘Me’!

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Main Shayar to nahi……..

Main aur shayari? Is this possible? But yeah, some impossibles do happen with me!

Here’s the first (and perhaps the only good one!) composition of mine, that fueled me to write some more

Dil ke karib unko laana to nahi tha,
unke aane ka koi bahana bhi to nahi tha,
vo bas, aa gaye mere khwabon main fasana ban ke,
do pal ruke, aur chal diye vapis ye samaj ke,
ki mera khwab unka aashiyana to nahi tha !!

I was glad to see this first composition… As and when I reached office, I fired a mail with this to some of my buddies boasting about my creativity But every one was so confident about my non-creative personality, that they could not digest if I can write something like this!!

So badly disappointed by their denial, my broken heart got one more composition..

paheli baar iis dil ne kuch likhna chaha,
ek anjane ahesaas ko shabdon main batana chaha,
magar iis zalim zamane ne aise thokarein maari
ki na shabd mile na vo ahesaas raha !!

And this time, whooww, Aakanksha replied with her own piece, and followed by my response in the same style and then…… gosh it’s a history So here goes the list……

ahista ahista yun dil mein shabdo ko layie
ahista ahistra yun humari ruh ko chhu jayie
Mohobbat ke lamhe pirota hein dil
kya bataye kitna rota hein dil
mere dil ke dard ki dawa de jayie
ahista ahista youn dil mien shabdo ko layie.

shabdon ke khel main dil kahin kho na jaye
lamhon ke motiyon ki maala kahi tut na jaye
ye maala kitni anmol hai ye na jaana aapne
kya khatah thi humari ki ye saza di aapne

vo samajte hai ki humein kuch pata nahi
par unki bhi ismein koi khata nahi
andaz e ishq bayan nahi hota labzon main
vo to bas mahesoos hota hai isharon main

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jaan kar bhi woh hume pahechan na paye,
unki nafarat ko pyar main badal na paye,

khud hi ki ye bewafai humne
taki un par koi ilzam na aaye

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aaj yeh jaana pyaar ki kashish kya hai..
aaj jaana woh tadap chubhan kya hai..
ek baar hi sahi zindagi main aa jaate..
jaan jaate wo milane ki khushi kya hai…

baithe the chaurahe par karke intazar unka
yeh aansuon bhi ro pade jab hua didar unka

Humne to aas laga rakkhi thi unse ikrar-e-ishq ki,
Par bewajood kar gaya hamein inkaar unka

chal diye ghar jala kar hasi khwaab apna
jahan unko paaya muskurate,angoothi ke saath

saheli apni hi thi,jisne pehnayi wo angoothi unhe
milaya tab socha na tha wo chura legi humse unhe

Humne to dosti ka farz nibhaaya hai
Ab tanhaaiyon ko hi gale lagaya hai
Teri dosti to hai shiddat meri
Eh dost!! aap bhi janoge kya thi vafa unki

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humne to socha tha ki jaate jaate do labz suna jayenge
magar aapne humerein labzon ko bhi paraya kar diya

dil ke dard ki dava na dhundh sake
juban par aayi vo baat na bol sake
lekin vo itne anari bhi nahi hai
ki humare dil ki aarzoo na samaj sake

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Pyar vo humse bepanah kar gaye,
Fir Zindagi main humko tanha chhod gaye,
Chahat thi unke ishq main fanna hone ki,
Magar vo laut ke aane se mana kar gaye…

ek majboori unki rahi hogi
dil ne lakh koshish ki samajhaane ki
maan bhi jaate naadani hum unki
par woh naye humsafar sang mil gaye

kya batau unko humne kaise bitaye ye din
lakh koshish kar chuke yaadon ko dil se juda karein
vo koshishein hi badhaati gayi tadap judai ki
koi batayein humko kaise bhuley vo chahera

ek hi aas ne har saans ko hava di
unki umeed ne mujhe jeene ki saja di
todna chaha jab bhi yeh saanso ka silsila
har aah ne unke launtane ki ek wajah di

vo wajah hi jindagi main ek aas jaga gayi
buji-na-buji vo aag ko hawa deti gayi
subah uthate hai ye soch ke bhula denge unko
lekin ye soch main hi hum unko yaad karte gaye

har dua main naam unka jud chuka hai yu
har khwaab main shaamil hai woh kyu
bhulaana chaha unhe maine jab bhi
ruh ne saath chodane ki kasam di

Humne to chaahi thi khushiyan hazaar, lekin
Humare dard ko dard hua jab hua khushi ka deedar

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Yu to tere siva bhi zindagi main gam kam nahi…
teri umeed ke alawa koi bhram naa ho.. yu bhi nahi

par tera gam kuch is kadar zehan pe havi hai…
har muskaan pe chahi kuch yu khamoshi hai…

Dard main khushi ka ek pal bhi hazaar dard deta hai
leti hu jab naam khuda ka tera hi naam kyun sunta hai..

maine kabhi khushi chahi naa ho..yu bhi nahi
tanhaai main thaamne waalo ki bhi kami nahi…

na jaane kyun tab bhi dil tujhe hi dhundhta hai…
har aaine main sang apne tera bhi aks kyun dikhta hai

ajnabi.. kuch is kadar khwaabon main tum aaye..
tere saaye par bhi dil ne sau armaan yu jagaaye…

ki har ashq jo dil se dhalta hai..
teri umeed main aankh par hi rahta hai..

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So guys, how was that? Not bad huh?

This is how me and Aakanksha started our new game of passing shayaries with somewhere, guest appearence by Sonia We had even thought of honoring our talent with a small book !!!! (ha ha ha) and hence as a part of this resolution, Aakanksha was assigned the job to find out new ‘urdu’ words, and you know what? She did get a list to start with !!!

I could never find out the reason, but somehow our shayaries were full of ‘dard’.. Me and akku are probably the most lively and fun-loving gals, but when it came to shayaries, we were the‘tragedy queens’ !!! (or ‘do dukhiyari’ – label gifted by anita!!)

But lately, I feel that ’shayar’ inside me is dying out, these days I have become more practicle than emotional as a person.. so I had to say bye bye to this great art of mine.. So doston, here are my parting words (and without fail followed by akku’s add ons !)

haan shayari hum kabhi kiya karte the
dard ko labzon mein bayan karte the
par ab na dard raha na vo labz rahe
ye shayar ke jine ki vajah na rahi

woh din kuch aur the jab
dard lawjo me baya hota tha
woh din kuch aur the jab
ashq aankho se chalka karte the

ab tanhaayi hi meri hamsafar hai
mera dard lawzon ka mohtaj nahi
ab mujhe kisi sahare ka ilm tak nahi
meri aahein aawaz ko talashati bhi nahi

#337, 1st floor gals, I really miss your company, for everything …. be it Good morning tea, singing aloud, midnight maggie, naughty nautankies, shameless shaitani, chillie chats, dirty dancing , or these shayaries…

zindagi ke safar mein yaar hazar milenge
kya pata hum jaise shaitan kitne honge
yun to ja rahe hai aapse durr
par mat samajna ki aap bach gaye huzuar

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